But the offences I have committed are venial in comparison with what I should commit were I to wed your father. She was never able to trace the changes her attitude had undergone, from the time when she believed herself to be the pampered Queen of Fortune, the crown of a good man’s love (and secretly, but nobly, worshipping some one else), to the time when she realized she was in fact just a mannequin for her lover’s imagination, and that he cared no more for the realities of her being, for the things she felt and desired, for the passions and dreams that might move her, than a child cares for the sawdust in its doll. She had only to get through this, to solace Manning as much as she could, to put such clumsy plasterings on his wounds as were possible, and then, anyhow, she would be free—free to put her fate to the test. Manning,” she said, “I warned you not to idealize me. “But it still misses the nucleolus. There are, then, in this sorry world, people who can be disinterestedly kind!" The doctor laughed, gave Spurlock's shoulder a pat, and left the room. “What have you done to yourself?” he muttered. She was trying to bring her problems to a head, and her mind insisted upon being even more discursive and atmospheric than usual. “You needn’t be worried,” she said quietly.
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